People And Their Pesky Glitches (March 5, 2006)

I saw some baseball footage the other day of a catcher with a weird psychological glitch. He had a hard time throwing the ball back to the pitcher.

It was a little funny, but also heartbreaking. The poor guy would catch the ball, stand and cock his arm, begin his motion and then just stop. Maybe he'd fake a throw to first if a runner was on. It would take him two or three tries before he could overcome this whole-body hiccup. He could hit, catch, and call a good game, but tossing the ball to the pitcher froze him like a teenager asking a girl for a date. It eventually drove him out of baseball.

Lots of people, I think, probably more than we suspect, have these annoying glitches that make life harder than it ought to be. My mother, for example, said that when she was in kindergarten she could not speak in school. I mean literally could not speak. Articulate and talkative elsewhere, she completely shut down in the classroom to the point where the teacher assumed she was mentally retarded. Then the teacher gave a written test that Mom aced in seconds. Afterwards the teacher called her aside and gave her a doll as a present. Young as she was, Mom perceived that the teacher was apologizing for having dismissed her as an idiot. (Daffy as an otter, yes, but Mom was no idiot.)

It wasn't until Mom was in her 50s that she was able to read the Bible out loud in a Sunday School class. (Then she went from being nervously silent to worrying about not being able to shut herself up.) I mentioned her example to someone the other day who presented me with a terrific prayer request: to have the boldness to be able to pray out loud in front of people. Excellent! That is a useful ability, and, frankly, something that is easy for me. I even ask total strangers in distress if I can pray for them right there. (I won't tell you what my glitches are, though. Not because I fear being vulnerable, but because members of my congregation might not be reassured knowing the ways in which their pastor can be a total NUTcase.)

I wonder if St. Paul found himself freezing up at just the wrong times. He kept asking people to pray that he could talk. See Ephesians 6:19: "Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel"; and Colossians 4:4: "Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should." In 2 Corinthians 10:10 he acknowledged what some people whispered about him: "His letters are weighty and forceful, but in person he is unimpressive and his speaking amounts to nothing." Maybe Paul suffered from a nasty verbal glitch.

I have no clue how to help those who are afflicted with glitches other than to be merciful to them, and pray, and remember that glitches abound in unsuspecting places for many a tortured soul. It is also good to be patient with ourselves, and keep in mind that all such hindrances will be ironed out in heaven, where stutterers will speak free, and the fearful will dance, and catchers for the Kingdom will fire confident strikes back to the mound.