When You Are Slandered (March 28, 2004)

Both my sons were recently subjected to false accusations by classmates. (No, I didn't choose to believe "their side of the story" simply because they're my boys: both accusations, though unrelated, were demonstrably false.) They didn't get in any trouble, but they still had to nurse the wounds of blighted reputation, and defend themselves with "I didn't do that! Ask so-and-so!" or "Trust me, I'm not like that."

I tried to speak words of comfort and counsel to them. I can sympathize with the falsely accused, having been subjected to an absurd slander about five years ago that had me grinding my teeth with anger. I later found out that my accuser - who never confronted me but only talked to others - turned out to be guilty of the very sin that I was being accused of! I thought bitterly, "Well isn't that ironic."

Or maybe it isn't so ironic. Perhaps the person most likely to suspect you of sin is the one who is yielding to it himself. A thief thinks you're embezzling because, well, that's what he would do in your situation. A liar just knows you're shading the truth because she herself deals falsely with people all the time and can't imagine you're any different.

People project their sinful souls onto others. Among the many corrupting influences of sin is the fact that it darkens spiritual vision, making the sinner incapable of seeing - much less appreciating - holiness and kindness and goodness in others. All the world looks dark through the welder's goggles of sin. If you have stuffed your
nostrils with dung, even a rose will smell bad.

Human scum found Jesus bad, and killed him. And if they slandered him, certainly they'll slander you and hate you for things you never did. It will always grieve us, but ought never surprise us, when we are lied about and made to bear the punishment for things concerning which we are innocent.

Some words of counsel regarding slander: First, it is o.k. to defend yourself. St. Paul does so vigorously in 2 Corinthians chapters 10 through 12. My sons did the right thing in protesting their innocence. Second, avoid slanderers. I have forbidden one son to have any further contact with the person who wrote a nasty email about him. ("Arguments and fights will come to an end if you chase away those who insult others" - Proverbs 22:10, CEV). Third, be careful about believing too hastily the bad reports you hear about others. Check the source, and when possible speak to the individual accused. Many times I have seen an absolutely reliable individual pass along unreliable information because he never imagined he had cause to doubt it. And finally, when slandered, consider this humbling thought: most of us have gotten away with lots of sin that nobody ever found out about or rebuked us for. Since those remain hidden from the eyes of others, maybe it is only fair in the long run that our reputations should get slammed from time to time for wholly fictitious crimes and misdemeanors.